When in doubt, tell the truth.

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.

I have lived a long life and had many troubles, most of which never happened.

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.

Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.

I've had thousands of problems in my life, most of which never actually happened.

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.

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